3 months

I started writing this on August 6th but I found it hard to get the words down. So I’m going to attempt to get it out. I’m sorry it’s been so long since I’ve written.
It’s been a busy busy month.
Trying to get back into the swing of things is a little more difficult than I imagined and much more difficult than I actually let on.
But people have grown weary of my grief.
So I put on the face and soldier on.

3 months, little man.
I cannot believe that it’s been 3 months since you had to go.
Every day since you left is still just as hard.
It still hurts more than I can say. Learning to live without you is something I never wanted to do.
But I do, because I have to.
The only other choice is not an option.

There isn’t a moment that goes by that I don’t think of you.
We’d be 29 weeks now.
Getting ready for your arrival.
But instead we are apart.
You are gone and I am here with out you.
There is nothing more painful than that.

I see you in everything I do.
Everywhere I go.

You are all things encompassing me.

I feel so grateful for your energy around me.
I know that you are here and I hope that I never lose that.

You are my brightest light little man.
You are everything I dreamed about.
Everything I have ever hoped for.
Everything I have ever wanted.
You’ve made your mommy and daddy so very proud.
I just wish you could be here to experience all of our love.
I’m so so sorry that you couldn’t be.

I love you Graeme. Now and forever.


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